A lot of people say that your first born tends to become your guinea pig, and although every child is different, I find this often to be true.
As I am coming up on week 36 of my second pregnancy, my husband and I had some time to reflect on things we did in the beginning, as well as things we would like to do differently this time. Here’s a few!
1. Create a capsule wardrobe
I really wish I had done this with Wren! The excitement of having our first baby drove us to dozens of baby clothing stores and we ended up with way more than we needed. Like, WAY more. There are things she never even got to try on! This time, I carefully picked a lot of transitional and fairly neutral pieces that I can mix and match. Of course, there are pieces we bought just for fun and cuteness sake, but her clothing drawer is far more functional.
2. Actually use the crib/bassinet
This one is going to depend on how good and independent of a sleeper she is, but I want to try to use the bassinet from the get-go. I let Wren co-sleep with me, and although I loved it, she is still struggling. She both hates being woken up if we move around in bed with her and seems frustrated to be there, but also hates the crib every now and then. My mind might change with how this baby responds, but I do want to give it more of a chance!
3. Less guilt
This one is hard for every mom, and no less for me. I really struggled with asking for help from loved ones and even leaving Wren with Alec to take a quick shower. It was really only during this pregnancy that I made a conscious effort to say yes to help and understand that people WANT to help me! And I should let them!
4. Embrace my labor experience
If you have read my birthing story, you’ll know my planned epidural failed…twice. And guess what! I still did it! I would like to have another epidural, don’t get me wrong, but at least I know if it doesn’t work I will be ok! I think I relied too heavily on thinking I would get one/it would work, that I kind of panicked when it didn’t. There is no right way to labor! If you want to scream and curse, go for it, mama! But I hope to be a little calmer this time. Every contraction will bring me closer to my baby!
5. Not rushing the 4th trimester
I really struggled with my body image after birth. Despite the fact my body just performed a superhuman act, I wanted to hide it in every way possible. Instead of being thankful I was able to breastfeed my baby, I complained about my large chest. I was losing weight- but not fast enough, I would constantly tell myself. My beautiful baby took an entire 9 months to grow, but I wanted to “snap back” in 6 weeks. I hope to give myself a little more grace this time! Healthy is my goal… Not just physically, but mentally too!
Some things we want to do again: baby-led weaning, Montessori play, making freezer meals before birth, and baby-led sleep schedules.